Visitor at sunset ②

　――The twenty-ninth time.

　As expected, Akira woke up in his usual hospital bed after being killed by the Werewolf.
　At the end of his previous life, Akira went toe-to-toe with the Werewolf as a trial run, but in the face of its overwhelming Speed, he could not hold his own without Dash.
　But there were some gains.
　The thing is, he now knew how the Werewolf attacked.
　Apparently, the Werewolf's fighting style was centered on slashing and hand-to-hand combat with claws extending from its hands, and its specialty was a series of attacks with quick movements.

(His movements were quick and light. A lousy attack will be quickly evaded and lead to a chance for a counterattack…… As I thought, I'll be relying on my Dash skill this time too.)

　Akira calmly analyzed this, and while the Auto Regen healed his body, he thought back to his previous life and solidified the image of the battle with the werewolf in his mind.
　It was now evening, and soon it would be time for Karube to visit.
　Akira's body, which had been fully wounded, had recovered to the point where he could move without problems.


(It's a good thing I raised my Auto Regen skill level. The time it takes to get my body to move is half of what it used to be.)


　Akira checked his condition by getting up. ……No problem. Judging from the pain, at this rate, it would be less than an hour before he was fully recovered.


(Since this Return from Hell, the Minotaur's battle axe as well as the Orc's iron sword have returned to the past with me…… I can't move around the hospital with these.)

　Akira thought about this as he turned his attention to those objects on the floor.

　Before taking on the boss, he needed to find Nao.
　In this loop, which could be called a re-print of the world, people behave almost identically to the movements in his memory unless he acted differently here than he did before.
　But Nao was now, like Akira, a person who repeatedly returned from Hell.
　Previously, she had been drugged and taken to a hospital room for trauma-induced flashbacks, but this time she may not be as traumatized and deranged as before.
　In that case, she should be resting her mind and body somewhere in this hospital.

(I wish there was someone who might know where Nao-san is――――)

　With this in mind, Akira slipped out of the hospital room and started walking down the hallway.
　Akira spotted Karube walking toward him from across the hallway.
　Karube must have also noticed Akira walking down the hallway.
　Karube stopped moving with his mouth hanging open and stared at Akira as if he had not expected that a man who until this morning had been so wounded that he could barely move would be able to do so again.


"――――Ichi, jou……san?　Why are we here……? No, more importantly, can you move already? "


　He looked as if he had seen a ghost.
　No, Akira felt Karube's gaze turn to his feet, as if he actually thought so since it was believed that ghosts had no feet.
　At the sight of Karube, Akira chuckled slightly, thinking that this person also believed such a thing.
　Then he opened his mouth as if to reassure Karube.

"Yeah, well. It's the effect of a skill. You already know that I am not like the others out there, don't you? "

　Karube nodded his head in agreement, as if he had an idea of what he was talking about, even though he was puzzled by his words.


"……Certainly, I was very aware that you were not like us, Ichijou-san ………… I never thought that all those wounds would heal at once. What kind of skills would one need to acquire to achieve such amazing resilience?　Did you heal your physical wounds with some kind of magic after all? "
"No, it is the effect of a skill called Auto Regen. The skill requires 7 points, so if you have enough points, you should acquire it if you are active in fighting monsters."


　Karube said, "I see," and pondered his words.
　Perhaps he was wondering whether to accumulate and acquire the points by comparing the size of the points used to acquire the skill with the difference in his current status and the strength of the monsters. Akira thought as his eyes moved meticulously through the air.
　Akira opened his mouth after a pause to Karube, who had such a thoughtful look on his face.


"I have a more important question for you, Karube-san. Nao-san ...... Where is Nanase Nao?　I suspect, most likely, that she panicked during the battle with the Killer Bees and is taking a break."
"――――How did you know, Ichijou-san……?　It is true that Nanase-san suddenly hyperventilated during the battle with Killer Bees, and is now resting in a private room…………"
"I see. Thank you."

　Hearing the words "private room," Akira immediately had an idea where Nao was.
　He was about to slip past Karube to immediately turn his feet to the spot when he was approached again.

"Wa-wait a minute!　I have many questions for you, Ichijou-san!　About how you have in your room, a big axe, a sword, and how you, at a lower level, defeated the Minotaur――――"
"I'm sorry. I'll be sure to tell you why later."

　Akira forcefully terminated his conversation with Karube.
　From behind him, Karube again voiced his questions, but Akira did not respond to his voice until the very end.


　　　　　　　　　　　　◇　◇　◇



　He headed to the hospital room where he had visited several lifetimes before.
　The door to the hospital room, which he soon arrived at, was tightly closed as if to refuse any visitors.

"…………"

　Once there, Akira took a deep breath in front of the door.
　And slowly. Akira knocked on the door.

"――――Nao-san"

　The next sound was a small gulp, followed by a gasp from the room and the sound of something clattering to the floor.
　Apparently, she was definitely inside of this one.
　After a short pause to make sure there was no answer, Akira again addressed her, who was supposed to be inside.


"Nao-san. It's me, Ichijou."


　Slowly, as gently as possible, Akira spoke. Slowly, as gently as possible, Akira spoke.
　But, as expected, there was no response from her.
　It was not that her voice was not heard. As evidence of this, he sensed a presence on the other side of the door, breathing heavily and listening to him.


(……I don't have a choice, huh?)

　Letting out a sigh, Akira put his hand on the door handle.


"I'm opening it."

　Akira was about to open the door when she spoke.


"Stop!　Don't open it! "


　Words of dissuasion, bordering on screams, echoed from the room.
　Akira stopped moving at the sound of her voice and spoke to her in that position.


"……Why shouldn't I open it? "
"…………Because I can't face you."
"Face me?　Why not? "

　There was no response from Nao to these words.
　After a pause, Akira waited for Nao to speak.
　But the interrupted conversation never resumed.
　Akira exhaled slowly and put his strength into the door handle again.

"I'm sorry. I'm coming in."
"Wait, wait――――! "

　Again words of restraint echoed from the room, but this time they were not heeded.


　The inside of the room was tinged in red by the setting sun streaming in through the window.
　Akira first squinted at the vermilion color that covered his vision and then looked around the room.
　It was as if she had been there ever since that night. Akira found Nao sitting on the bed in the exact same position she was in at that time, holding her knees.

　If there was a difference, it was that she had large tears streaming down her cheeks.
　Akira's eyes caught the reflection of the setting sun in the tears that streamed down her face.
　Nao quickly wiped her cheeks and eyes and turned over to hide her face.


"…………Why did you come in?"

　In a muffled voice, Nao spoke.

"I didn't want you to see me like this. …………I told you not to open the door."
"……I'm sorry. But I really wanted to talk to you, Nao-san."
"We could have just talked through the door."
"Indeed we could, but …… It's a tad lonely talking through the door when we haven't even had a fight."
"But who would come in without permission? Dumb."

　Nao said, her face downcast.
　Akira opened his mouth once at the sight of Nao but eventually swallowed his words and quietly closed it.
　There were many words that needed to be spoken.
　But because there were so many, Akira didn't know which words to say.
　For a while, the conversation between the two came to a halt.
　Akira let out a small sigh and turned to Nao.

"……May I sit down, too? "

　There was no reply.
　It was certainly small, though. Akira could see that Nao nodded.
　Akira gently sat down on the bed, as he had done that night.
　Then, again, he stared down at his hand, as he had done that time, and let the words slip out as if he were muttering.

"…………Nao-san. Let's go outside. My preparations are done. Now all that's left is you, Nao-san."

　There was no response from Nao to these words.
　Akira looked at Nao and asked her a question, this time changing the subject, hoping for some kind of response.

"……Earlier, you said you couldn't face me. What did you mean by that?　I don't think it's because you don't want me to see you crying like that, is it? "

　Nao did not respond to these words either.
　I guess it's still no good. With that thought in mind, Akira was about to open his mouth to change the subject again.
　Nao let her words slip out in a small voice.


"…………Twice."
"Eh? "
"You have died twice since then. While I'm like this, doing nothing."

　Akira exhaled slowly, in understanding.
　Because now he knew what she was feeling guilty about.

"So you didn't want to see me? "
"……That's right. While you were fighting in this world, I did nothing. I could not!　I didn't even fight the monsters!!　As I am...... What am I supposed to do now that I've met you?"

　Nao's last words out of her mouth were minutely trembling.
　Nao squeezed her own arm with one hand and spat out more words with her face down.

"In the end, you're the only one doing the best you can. I shouldn't have been like that……!　After all, you are the only one who is trying to do something on your own!! "


　――She couldn't forgive herself for that.


　Akira could painfully feel Nao's sorrowful cry, even if she did not say it out loud.


"I thought many times while I was sitting here that you couldn't do it alone. I tried to get up. ……But I couldn't do it. When I see a monster, it reminds me of that event!　I just can't forget it!! "

　Nao finally lifted her face as she said this.
　Her bright red eyes, swollen with tears, caught sight of Akira, and the overflowing tears streamed down her cheeks.

"I can't. I can't do it, Ichijou. I know I can't go on like this, I know it myself, but…… I just can't help it, that incident ties me down!!　I can't even get up!! "


　Nanase Nao had always been a serious person.
　She was honest with herself, yet strict.
　She was the kind of person who would try to keep a promise she had uttered to the very end.

　That was precisely why she was now bound by those chains.
　Her body, paralyzed by a mind scarred by the return from death, further injured herself, yet again.
　She tries to stand up, but she can't. Nao herself cannot forgive herself for this, so she screams from the bottom of her heart.

　It's a terrible, vicious cycle. You could say that she kept strangling herself.

　Slowly, Akira lowered his eyes.
　Then he brainstormed about what could be done to ease her suffering.
　But no matter how much he thought about it, there was nothing he could do at this point.
　It seemed that the only way to break this situation that Nao suffered from was for her to overcome and recover from her own past wounds, or to change her original serious nature itself to accept her traumatic self.

(But that's wrong. I think it's wrong for Nao-san to stop being Nao-san.)

　Akira had always liked the serious Nao.
　Serious, but sometimes outgoing, kind and dependable to her kouhai and friends, Akira has loved her since the day he met her.
　Therefore, he wanted her to stay as she was.
　He hoped she would not change that character because of the emotional scars she had suffered in this world.
　She was what she was, and that was a part of Ichijou Akira's daily life.
　No matter how much the world may have changed since the monsters showed up.
　That was the one thing he did not want to see change.


(This is…… Just my ego. It's a selfish imposition. ………… But, considering Nao-san herself, this is definitely for the best.)

　Akira, clenching his fists tightly, turned to Nao and slowly uttered these words.


"……Nao-san. The only way to overcome your trauma is to get up on your own feet. If you can't stand alone, then I can stand beside you. I can lend you my shoulder. I will reach out to you as much as I can. ……So once again. Come with me and step out into this world where monsters have appeared."
"But, Ichijou…… I am――――"
"It's alright. It's okay now. I will protect you, Nao-san. I won't let the boss go for you, Nao-san. I swear to you that I will protect you, literally with my life. For that, I would redo this world over and over again."

　Akira stared intently at Nao.

"First, let's work together to defeat the boss. Let's end this whole nightmare, Nao-san. Let's make sure you never have to experience the fear of returning from death any more than you already have, Nao-san."


　Nao bit her lip hard at Akira's words.
　Then, with another small quiver of her lips, Nao nodded her head.


"Gotcha."

　Nao muttered, and then she grabbed her own arm with one hand again.
　Then, with a loud exhale through trembling lips, she said in a voice that seemed to fade away.


"…………Sorry."


　What was that mumbled apology for?
　Akira never got to hear the reason for this until the end.

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 ToC    

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